I'm wearing this stupid boot. A boot on my right foot. And I have to keep it on 24/7 at least until Monday. The only time I can take it off is when I shower or bike. I even have to sleep in the dang thing!
The good thing is that I had 2 MRI's today (I'll explain in a sec), and the doctor told me that it's just inflammation and a lot of fluid surrounding the calf and achilles, not a tear. This is great news. It means I have a much shorter recovery time, and with proper rest and treatment I should be able to try running on Monday! :) I was hoping to hear that I would be able to run Friday or Saturday, but I'd much rather wait to run on Monday than have a serious injury that prevents me from running indoor or outdoor season.
|It's definitely NOT the cutest accessory..|
So then I go to my 12:00 class that I have with Connor. Early U.S. history. It was our discussion section which is only on Wednesdays. Connor freaked out about reading all of the articles earlier this week. I told him not to worry about it. People rarely read them thoroughly. So then we're in our class of about 25 students, and how many have read the documents? 3. Some guy in the front, Connor, and myself. haha. I knew it. And of course I am a know-it-all, so I answer all of the questions he asks.. Sometimes I don't like it cuz I worry about people judging me, but I just hate sitting there knowing an answer and only hearing silence (or even worse, the wrong answer). Ha, I just have to correct them. I blame my dad. He's the same way about always being right and stuff :/
Anyway, I biked right after class. It was only supposed to be a 10 minute warmup, 2x15 x 60 seconds hard and 30 seconds rest b/w reps with 3 minutes between sets, then a 10 minute cooldown. I lost count on the last set, and I'm pretty sure I did closer to 18 reps instead of 15. I kinda knew this, but I wanted to work hard today cuz I knew my team was doing a workout, and I don't want to lose any fitness or get behind :/ I know this is stupid. I'm not gonna lose it in one day. But still.. I also did a 15 minute warmup & 15 minute cooldown.. Overall, it was a good workout. And I DID eat lunch after, even though I was stretched on time cuz I had to GO BACK to the stupid hospital to get another MRI because they didn't scan the correct area the first time. How dumb.
As for eating, I had a Kashi Go Lean Roll bar right before I went to see the doctor back at our training room. I was proud of myself for choosing this bar instead of a FiberOne bar just because the Kashi has 40 more calories. Retarded, huh? But that's how my brain works. :P
I'm glad changes like this are getting easier, though.
Then I came home and really just wanted to pop in a Lean Cuisine. But I also knew that this wasn't enough. So I made dinner. Lemon pepper spiced cod, lightly salted edamame, and a sweet potato WITH butter (a suggestion my nutritionist has been begging me to follow for quite some time now). Did I mention how much I LOVE sweet potatoes? :D And I will admit, that it was pretty good with that dab of Smart Balance butter :)
Anyway, I WOULD eat now, except I'm afraid it will turn into a bingeing episode. This is the reason I haven't been eating very much at all past dinner lately. Last night I had a pb fiber one bar right before bed, but that's just because it's prepackaged. I can deal with that. Something like cereal or yogurt or peanut butter & pretzels-these things aren't already set out for me. It's scary for me to start eating it cuz I don't know if I'll be able to stop. So I just chew gum and drink water to satisfy myself. Stupid, huh?
Sometimes it's just hard for me cuz I don't see how what I'm doing is wrong. I eat three meals a day. I snack. I eat all of the food groups. But it's simply not enough.
Anyway, I just read my blogger friend Liz's post and it makes me want to eat. She just mentioned her talking back to her ED, and it motivates me to nourish my body the way it wants. Yes, it may have gotten all of the meals for the day, but if I keep on at this rate I'm going to lose weight. Something I definitely don't want to do. I can't go back with my recovery. I'm so much happier. I've gotta push through.
I'm sorry this post is boring and kinda depressing :( I guess I just need some motivation.
Anyway, I'm about to go find something to snack on.